Does any of this sound familiar?
-I can’t say no
-I have too much on my plate
-I need to be needed
-It’s all just too much
-I just don’t feel like I’m enough
If these thoughts are running through your head, then you might just be suffering from the Disease To Please.
To get a clearer understanding if this is your diagnosis, answer the following questions:
- Do you say yes when you really want to say no?
- Do you apologize often? When you are actually not sorry? When you are angry as a way to diffuse and/or end an argument?
- Do you avoid confrontation at all costs?
- Do you put everyone else’s needs above your own?
If you answered yes to any of the above questions, you have the disease to please.
When you have the disease to please, you live in fear, anxiety, and overwhelm. You fear what others think about you, and you fear being a failure and not living up to the perfection model. These two inevitably lead to taking on more than you can handle because you don’t want to disappoint anyone, which, simply put, equals anxiety and overwhelm.
When you do a deed out of guilt or to avoid discomfort with confrontation, you are being inauthentic and dishonest. These qualities cannot exist in truly loving relationships. How can anyone authentically love you if they do not authentically know you? Being dishonest with others, and ultimately with yourself, robs you of living a soul-directed, purpose-driven life where you actually get to have what you want and feel good doing it.
Luckily, a simple mindfulness exercise can be just the prescription!
For the next 48 hours, write down every time you commit any of the above actions. What was the scenario? Why did you respond the way you did? This requires you to not only be very aware of your words and actions but honest about your intentions. If you got into an argument, what was the argument, and were you truly sorry for your behavior or did you just want to get the other person off your back? Did someone ask a favor, what was it, and did you agree to do it because you genuinely wanted to or because you feel guilty saying no?
For more tips, listen to what NY Times best-selling author, one of Oprah’s favorites, and an overall brilliant lady, Cheryl Richardson, has to say about setting boundaries and saying no to others in order to get what you want (and how to do it without feeling guilty and worrying that you’re hurting or letting others down).
Check out this enlightening video: http://thetappingsolution.com/cmd.php?Clk=4704084
I know 99.9% of you have something to say about this topic. This disease is reaching pandemic proportions! So, type away; it’s just what the doctor ordered! What did you discover in the Terri-prescribed 48-hour challenge?
Love Love Love
P.S. If you enjoyed this video, be sure to join ME along with Cheryl, Kris Carr, Nick Ortner, and many others presenting at this year’s Tapping World Summit. We’re kicking fear to the curb and swapping outdated mental blueprints for fresh brain construction. Summit starts May 7. Registration for this F*REE event is NOW OPEN!