self-love Archives - terri cole

18 Meggan Watterson – How to Love Yourself (And Sometimes Other People)

Today we’re talking about love: loving yourself, and how that love can help you love others. And to help me talk about it, I’m bringing in a leader in the field of feminine divine and spirituality, Meggan Watterson. I first met Meggan at her first Reveal conference, where she told her incredible story about her studies, her pilgrimage to sites of the divine feminine, and her understanding of herself as a spiritual misfit. Meggan’s new book, How to Love Yourself (and Sometimes Other People) was written with her co-author Lodro Rinzler, and is packed full of spiritual advice for modern love and relationships. The content is so accessible, and we share a lot of the same beliefs about how self love is the path to true love. I think you’ll love our conversation all about loving yourself and others. Thanks for listening in. You can Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher or TuneIn   “Ultimately, that outward search for finding that source of love that’s going to be limitless and unconditional needs to be directed inward.” –  Meggan Watterson Show Notes: How she met co-author Lodro Rinzler People’s desire to feel worthy of love Why people sabotage love that comes into their lives How our capacity to love ourselves correlates with our capacity to love someone else What creates codependence “At the root of our search for love is this need to feel worthy of it.” – Meggan Watterson   How our interior world is reflected back to us The importance of understanding what we want sexually The difference between sex and sacred sex Why you have to be courageous to love yourself...

04 Gala Darling – The Queen of Radical Self Love

Today I’m so excited to be sharing my interview with Gala Darling. Gala is an absolute inspiration, who looks at the world with a sense of adventure and total possibility. She is also a teacher, author and speaker teaching about radical self love. Her website helps women find their voice, live without fear, and fall in love with their life. Her book, which she first self published, is going to be re-released next year, and I can’t wait to pick up a copy. I can’t wait for you to hear her story about how she overcame depression, an eating disorder, and her self-described love affair with being miserable to become the queen of self celebration. You can Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher or TuneIn   “I felt like these horrible glasses had been taken off and I was finally seeing the world for the beautiful place it really was.” –  Gala Darling Show Notes: Why the change to get offline How she ended up in New York Why she fell in love with the internet at a young age How her upbringing affected her positive attitude How she overcame depression and self harm How her blog progressed from fashion to self care The healing properties of expressing yourself through fashion The value of consistent positive encouragement “Wearing something that feels like a true expression of yourself and makes you stand up a little taller can change the way you approach your day.” – Gala Darling   Why you need to practice radical self love every day Why you have to prioritize your own self care Non-negotiable self care rituals Why she decided to...
Creating Love that Lasts

Creating Love that Lasts

Do you believe you are worthy of your own time? Love? Money? Do you dress up for no other reason than because it makes you feel good? Do you treat yourself with the love, care and respect that you do with other people in your life? Whether you are in a relationship or looking for love, most of you know, somewhere down deep, that self love is the path to true love. You know the most important relationship you will ever have is with yourself. And you also know that you can’t love anyone else if you don’t authentically love yourself. Unfortunately this knowing isn’t always evident in your thoughts and behavior. For most people there is a belief that without a romantic partner they are incomplete. (For those of you in a relationship feeling complete may be dependent on your partner doing and saying exactly the right thing to make you feel good.) Though this idea that happiness is dependent on someone else is a surefire way to give away your power, your potential and your joy. It’s not always easy, and you may feel even a bit silly, doing things like buying yourself flowers, treating yourself to the movies or watching a sunset alone. However, these simple acts of love towards yourself are the kind of action steps that can bring you the fulfillment, happiness and LOVE you’ve been searching for that can only be found within you. It’s in taking responsibility for the amount of love that you create and allow in your life the draws more love closer to you. Yes, it really can be that simple. I can...
A Reason to Celebrate

A Reason to Celebrate

I was sitting in my therapist’s office the day after I graduated with my Masters from NYU. He asked how I felt about my big accomplishment. “I have been up most of the night researching PhD programs for the Fall,” was my reply. “Can you stop for a moment and celebrate?” he asked. Which was a good question because it had never entered my mind that it might be important to acknowledge and celebrate all of my hard work. This session was a turning point when I realized the importance of celebrating big and small accomplishments and creating rituals. Once I was able to slow down long enough to let it all sink in, I realized I did not want or need to get my PhD and that immediately planning the next thing was a way to avoid feeling the normal anxiety that change creates. Do you celebrate yourself and your hard work? Do you take the time to enjoy reaching goals big and small? I find that many of my high achieving clients are future focused like I used to be. The problem with this defense mechanism of onto the next, is that it robs you of the joy of present moment consciousness. There will always be another goal to reach but without the sweet moment of being here now and celebrating, it can be an endless cycle of striving. Oprah says that the more you celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate, and I agree! Most cultures reserve celebrations for annual holidays and ‘big’ life events such as birthdays, weddings, births and retirement....
Shame on You?

Shame on You?

Have you ever done anything you’re not proud of, like feigning a headache to get out of a dinner or snapping at your partner in a heated moment? Of course you have because you’re human. You mess up, like we all do, and when it happens, you probably feel guilty. Guilt is a normal emotion that people experience when they believe they have caused harm or done something wrong. We all make mistakes and those mistakes often affect other people, therefore we feel guilt. If your feelings of guilt cause daily anxiety or are out of proportion to the actual mistakes you’ve made, you might be suffering from an even more toxic emotion: Shame.   Shame is commonly confused with guilt. People who experience shame often feel bad for every little error they make, and are in a constant state of fear of making more. For this reason they may feel fear around authority figures, judge themselves harshly, and have a low sense of self esteem. GUILT says I’ve DONE something wrong. SHAME says I AM something wrong. Shame is TOXIC & Has to Go @Terri_Cole {CLICK TO TWEET} 7 Days to More Self Love Living with shame can strip away the joy and freedom that you deserve to experience. Shame most often stems from a wounded part of you that was convinced in childhood that you weren’t enough. Though this is not the truth, it may feel that way, as beliefs that you carry for decades, become your reality. You then begin to live out that reality by taking on jobs, and getting into relationships, that don’t meet...