17 May How comfortable are you with the change process?
Do you like where you are in this exact moment in the change process?
Whether you answered yes or no, let me remind you: it’s about to change. In fact, it is changing this very instant!
All of your life is a continuous state of transformation. From one second to the next your physical body is changing as well as the structure of your brain from an array of factors including meditation, learning new skills and integrating new information.
For some of you the idea of things changing may bring a sense of relief, while for others it can inspire fear. Perhaps you find yourself using denial to resist certain changes altogether. Even though the out of sight out of mind theory doesn’t work, it can still be tempting.
Sometimes change is expected (getting another year older, buying a new home, graduating from college) while other times it may come as a surprise (a proposal, a pregnancy, a job offer or an unexpected death). Whether you regard it as good or bad, change can be challenging. A routine provides some with a sense of comfort and stability. A sense of mastery and security can come from life being somewhat predictable. No matter what we do to brace against it or hold onto the illusion that we can control it, change is inevitable. Even good change can feel bad and produce anxiety, simply because we are forced from the known into the unknown.
When you become too attached to the familiar, you begin to resist the powerful flow of life. The change process is as natural as gravity. While you cannot see it, you will always experience its effects. You would never go through life trying to fight the effects of gravity, right? Try to think of change the same way.
Resisting the inevitable is futile but also anxiety provoking. Although it is true that things changing is guaranteed, how they change has everything to do with you. If you live under the illusion that life is happening to you, then it makes sense that change feels threatening. Conversely, if you tap into the power you have to influence the way things change by intending what you want to happen, you will be much more empowered as you travel through the many phases of your life.
The goal is to move from denial to acceptance to true celebration of change. Since it is going to happen anyway, do your best to influence how things change in your life and as the Serenity prayer states, “Accept the things I can not change.” I believe we honor what has gone before by being present to what is happening now. Your presence at any phase of life is the most important element to how you experience change and everything else.
Take some time today to think about where you may be resisting changes, as well as where you are welcoming them. Share in the comments below what is changing in your life right now. It could be as small as moving desks in your office, or as big as your first born graduating from college. No matter what it is, remind yourself that you can find valuable gifts in each and every change if you are willing to look for them.
Have a beautiful week flowing with life and, as always, take care of you.
Love Love Love
*image courtesy of Andrea Nlgels